The Devil Can't Help You Here - Mark Boliek

Darlinks! Dearestlinks! Poppets!

Here at Underneath The Juniper Tree we are open to all sorts of spooky mayhem in all sorts of mediums. Mark Boliek sent us a song, chatz, called "The Devil Can't Help You Here". And it goes along with his book. Is there no end to the creativity? Here is the cover for his book The Mahogany Door for which the music was written. Look, listen and enjoy.

 

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Don't forget to check out our July issue

Sunday Poetry: Dirty Donald - Dawn Pisturino & Jason Smith

Dirty Donald!

His hair, full of lice,

Grows down to his shoulders,

A haven for mice.

His teeth are all rotten,

Mildewed and black,

His tongue is so long,

He could pass for a yak.

His breath stinks of corpses

Dug fresh from their graves,

A delicate morsel

He constantly craves.

He glares at the ravens,

Surrounding his head,

With murderous eyes,

Pronouncing them dead.

Then yanks out their feathers

And nibbles their toes,

Lining them up

In neat little rows.

His clothes are so tattered,

The buzzards all say,

“What a fine looking fellow!

Let’s eat him today!”

Dirty Donald

Written by Dawn Pisturino

Illustrated by Jason Smith

Would you like to see your limerick or poem up on Sunday Poetry? Email it to us at junipertreelit@gmail.com and put "Sunday Poetry" in the subject line.

Don't forget to check out our July issue

The Man from Brazil - Dawn Pisturino

The Man From Brazil

Written by Dawn Pisturino 

Don't forget to check out our July issue

Choose Your Own Mystery - One Week To Go!

Just a friendly reminder for all you writerly artisticals out there:

ONE WEEK LEFT for the Choose Your Own Mystery Challenge!!!!

I get to munch one toe for every day that your submission is late.

That's right. Deadline is Saturday, July 23. Don't be late! Winners will be announced on Monday, July 25.

Good luck all you deviously daring drumlets.

And come back later today to read Dawn Pisturino's lively limerick The Man From Brazil. You might want to be sitting when you read it.



Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Contest Reminder

Illustrated by Jason Smith
jsmithillustration.weebly.com

Yes, it's already the middle of the month. I hope you've all been delving into your futuristic worlds and spouting to your scribe (because we all have one) your wonderful words.


Do not delay, leaflets, you only have 10 more days left to submit your monthly contest entry AND if you win, your piece will be featured in the August issue. Haste!


Guidelines
Stories and drawings/paintings/doodles must be about time travel. However you think time travel should be done, let us know in short story form (2000 words or fewer) or an image (one image per artist). It must also fit our guidelines in our Submit Work page. Submissions that do not adhere to the requirements will not be considered so read carefully!!!!! If you aren't sure as to what we accept, thumb through our June and July issues or scan the site to see what we're all about.

Only the most curious and imaginative pieces will be chosen and featured in the August issue of Underneath The Juniper Tree. If your pieces doesn't win but we're terribly keen on it (and Tex is in a good mood that day), we'll feature it on the site. The winning images will also be featured in Featured Artists located on the right sidebar.

When emailing us, please put "Time Travel" in the subject line.

With your submission, please include a short bio (50 - 75 words) about yourself written in third person with your name (or alias) and your website if you have one.

Email your story or artistic rendering to junipertreelit@gmail.com
Submission deadline: July 25, 2011
The winners will be announced in the August 2011 online issue which is free for all eager eyes to nom on.


Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Be one of our Contributors

Being one of our contributors is hard work. Having to write scary stories until they cry,

eating toes to keep invigorated,

running into dark forests to find the fantastically ferocious creatures that inspire their stories; it's really something to be in awe about.

Do you think you could do what our contributors do? Why don't you give it a shot: we are accepting general submissions of short stories (2000 word maximum), poetry, limericks, doodles, drawings, paintings, ghost rants, robot rhymes,

severed toes,

(please send those to Tex only) and any sort of rambunctious and stupendous stanza you might have secretly stowed away in that brain of yours.

Tell your friends. Your neighbors. Deceased ancestors.

Don't forget to check out our July issue

In The Street - Dorothy Livesay & Evan Heasman

In rainy weather

Who can tell

Whether we weep

Or not?

I dread the sun

For his fierce honesty.

In The Street

Written by Dorothy Livesay

Illustrated by Evan Heasman

Don't forget to check out our July issue

The Man in Galloway Bay - Dawn Pisturino

A man lost in Galloway Bay,

Cried out in a very loud bray,

"Please come rescue me, 

hungry sharks can't agree,

Am I breakfast or dinner entree?"

The Man in Galloway Bay

Written by Dawn Pisturino 

Don't forget to check out our July issue.

The Crooked Man: Animated Short - Dries Bastiaensen

Our lovely friend and contributor Ken Lamug revealed this gem to us the other day and we wanted to share it with you. It was all I could do to get it out of Tex's greedy little grabby hands.

My eyes saw it first. I was only going to add it to my...selection of...delectables.

We hope you enjoy this animated short before Tex eats it all up.






The Crooked Man
Animation by Dries Bastiaensen


Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Beware Sleeping Kittens - Cheryl Coville

Innocent kittens

Asleep in their cots

Helpless and harmless

How peaceful their thoughts.

But from the depths of

Their slumber, they dream

Murderous scenes filled

With ear-piercing screams.

Visions of slaughter

Of blood and of gore

Torment and terror.

Ferocious! They roar!

They hunger for prey

They catch on the sly.

Crunchy bird dinners

Snatched down from the sky.

They pounce on goldfish

And throw up the bones.

Then tease the dog who’s

Tied up at his home.

Animal ambush.

Mousey mass murder.

Kings of the jungle

Stalk the intruder.

They snarl and they slash.

They flash their fierce fangs.

Merciless mayhem

Is all that remains.

Such are the dreams of

The average kitten.

Better not wake him

Lest you get bitten.

Beware Sleeping Kittens

Written and illustrated by Cheryl Coville 

To see more of this calibre or macabre, check out our July Issue.
Would you like to see your limerick or poem up on Sunday Poetry? Email it to us at junipertreelit@gmail.com and put "Sunday Poetry" in the subject line.

Edward Gorey Challenge Chapter 2 Winner! And a new Challenge: Choose Your Own Mystery

The winner of our Edward Gorey challenge is.....

*Druummmmmm*

Madeline Daniel! Madeline was able to fit a barrage of imagery and thought into three incredible sentences. Below is just a hint of what's in store for the August issue where you get to read Madeline's full piece:

“Oh, that is terrible,” said the oak tree sympathetically.  

Thank you to everyone who submitted work! It was one of our best turn-outs yet. If you'd like to keep up to date with our challenges, contests and giveaways, just subscribe to Underneath The Juniper Tree on the right side of the screen. Now for our next challenge...

Choose Your Own Mystery

This week's challenge is an array of amusements. We will give you character, place and action options and you will create the story. You must choose one character, one place and one action from the list on which to base your story or artwork. So you will have chosen three options altogether. Capiche? Remember that choosing obvious choices will not get you anywhere. Please choose as creatively as possible, as random as possible, as unheard of as possible! Here are your choices:

Character 

1) Wendigo

2) Ghost of an angry child

3) Cockroaches 

Place

1) Decaying castle in Wales

2) Backwoods of Kentucky

3) Deserted hospital 

Action

1) Whispering the words "we all fall down"

2) Eating flesh

3) Head spinning 360 degrees

Guidelines

With your submission please put in the subject line "Choose Your Own Mystery Challenge".

Artists

Only One image can be submitted per person. Please check the Submit Work page under "Dimensions" to see how you should submit your image. With your submission please tell us a little bit about yourself.

Writers

Your piece must be under 500 words and containing your three choices. Be as creative as possible with what you've picked. When submitting your piece, please list your three choices. If you don't, I will be emailing you back and telling you that you are terrible at reading guidelines. And then you will probably not win. You can submit your work as a word document or paste it directly in the email to junipertreelit@gmail.com and please forgive us in advance if we don't write back to you immediately. Tex is fairly anal about reading and viewing everything we get.

Deadline for submissions has changed. We are now giving you TWO WEEKS to submit your piece so they better be good!

Deadline for submission: Saturday, July 23. The winners will be announced Monday, July 25.

For the rest of the guidelines and what should not be submitted, go to our Submit Work page.

Don't forget to check out our July issue.

The Wait - Wyatt Willis & Evan Heasman

Adèle sat in the highest bough of the red eucalyptus tree with her tiny, white hands folded in her lap. Below sat the Wolf running its tongue along its pearly, sharp teeth that glinted in the moonlight every time Adèle looked down. The Wolf’s lips curled back into a wicked grin.

I can wait, child. For years I can wait. You will grow weary and I will be here.

Adèle found herself slouching from exhaustion and pulled her back up straight to help keep alert. How long had it been, now? Three hours? Three days? Time cannot not be measured when the moon never moves and the sun never returns. She rubbed her toes that were beginning to tingle from the lack of blood.

She lay back into the rustling leaves of the tree. They gave off a red glow on her skin. Like blood, she thought. She looked up into the black sky that seemed so near for all its darkness. She had to put a hand in front of her face to remind her that her eyes were still open.

“I cannot fall asleep,” she thought, “or I will fall through these thin branches and be eaten, surely.” But her lids were heavy like stones and with each blink her body said, yes, yes it is nice to sleep, isn’t it?

Whether it was a sound or a movement that woke her, Adèle sat up with a start. She was already slipping through the arms of the tree.

Do not worry, precious gem, the Wolf hissed below, I am still here when you fall.

Not ‘if’ but ‘when’. Adèle shivered at the sweetness of the Wolf’s call. She would not close her eyes again.

She looked out over the land that was dotted with murky figures; forests spread out in clumps. She could only imagine what sort of horrors lived in those trees when something so terrible as the Wolf lived out in the open. She could barely distinguish the land from the sky; the varying black shapes seeped into each other. Off in the distance, little dots of light winked. She couldn’t tell if they were a village or the stars.

Adèle looked up into the velvety sky trying to get the image of the Wolf out of her mind but all she could see was its razorback fur and its haunting red eyes. She squeezed her eyes shut but could not get rid of the image. She rolled over and rested her head against the leaves.

“I’ll only lay here a moment and then,” her mouth stretched into a yawn, “I’ll figure out what to do.”

I will be here, child.

It wasn’t long after Adèle drifted off that she realized there were two red eyes looking directly at her. And then four eyes. And then hundreds of red eyes glowed around her. Every way she turned there were red eyes bearing down into hers.

“No!” She screamed. “No! NO NO NO-NO-NO!”

But it was too late.

Adèle’s tiny body slipped through the sparse twigs of the red eucalyptus tree and fell down, down, down into darkness and pearly, sharp teeth.

The Wait

Written by Wyatt Willis

Illustrated by Evan Heasman 

Monthly Contest - Time Travel

Here at UTJT, we not only sneak into dark forests and romp in swamps, we also slip through space in our marvelously metal time machine!

This month's contest is all about time travel. Perhaps your characters glide through time with a jet pack not unlike this image to the left here. Or maybe they use giant, glossy baubles? Or maybe they don't need a time machine at all, instead flying through time by entering a cave guarded by savage crocodile beasts with scales so sharp they cut through bone with the slightest bit of pressure.

Guidelines
Stories and drawings/paintings/doodles must be about time travel. However you think time travel should be done, let us know in short story form (2000 words or fewer) or an image (one image per artist). It must also fit our guidelines in our Submit Work page. Submissions that do not adhere to the requirements will not be considered so read carefully!!!!! If you aren't sure as to what we accept, thumb through our June and July issues or scan the site to see what we're all about.

Only the most curious and imaginative pieces will be chosen and featured in the August issue of Underneath The Juniper Tree. If your pieces doesn't win but we're terribly keen on it (and Tex is in a good mood that day), we'll feature it on the site. The winning images will also be featured in Featured Artists located on the right sidebar.

When emailing us, please put "Time Travel" in the subject line.

With your submission, please include a short bio (50 - 75 words) about yourself written in third person with your name (or alias) and your website if you have one.

Email your story or artistic rendering to junipertreelit@gmail.com
Submission deadline: July 25, 2011
The winners will be announced in the August 2011 online issue which is free for all eager eyes to nom on.

We look forward to reading all your submissions and potentially eating a few. Good luck to everyone!


Don't forget to check out our July issue.

The Boogeyman's Rhyme - Laura Garrison

My parents are shadows that lurk in your closet;

My very first word was an old man's last breath.

I watched from the wings on the night you were frightened

By blood on the white hands of Lady Macbeth.

My laugh is the scuttle of leaves on the sidewalk;

The weeds on your grandmother's grave are my hair.

My friends are the slime-trails that slugs leave behind them,

And I can freeze toads or melt stones with my stare.

My sigh is the hot wind that withers the foxglove;

My heart is the black rat that drowned in your well.

That dust layer under your bed is my dandruff;

The drain in your shower is ripe with my smell.

I might slip a fat spider into your slipper

Or give you an itch in a place you can't scratch.

While you're off at school, I leave lumps in your pillow

(In three or four days they'll be ready to hatch).

I chew on your boogers and old toenail clippings

At bedtime, when serpents and centipedes creep.

Next time you're alone in the darkness, remember:

My children are nightmares that poison your sleep.

The Boogeyman's Rhyme

Laura Garrison

Come back later today to learn about our contest for this month!

'ime'! 'ravel'!

Exactly, Tex. Good show!


Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Friendly Reminder - Edward Gorey Chapter II PLUS winner of Tex's book!

Just a friendly reminder that your Edward Gorey Chapter II submission deadline is TOMORROW!!!

The horror.

Quite. SO! You have until midnight tomorrow night to send them in.

junipertreelit@gmail.com


Now, to more important things: who won Tex's book?


Whose toes did I find the tastiest?


Tex! You didn't tell me you were taking bribes! You bad armadillian. Now, for the winners of the free books...


I drool at the thought...


Tex, they are your books! And the winners are...


Raych and Amanda are our glorious winners of this giveaway! Congratulations on your free books! Email to collect your book booty!


Thanks everyone for helping out and referring your friends and strangers to Underneath The Juniper Tree. And feel free to continue to refer your friends and family and writer friends and friends that doodle. We are always looking for new, great work!


And come back tomorrow for our monthly contest announcement. I'll give you a clue on what it's about–


Toes!


No.


Fingers!


No!


Brains?


It begins with 't' and ends with 'ime' 'ravel'. Until tomorrow!




Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Happy Fourth of July

This is Tex's favorite time of year. You can catch glimpses of him scurrying from house to house nibbling on all the fingers that have been, how you might put, detached from their owners during the fireworks. In fact, he is off busying himself with preparations for tonight's grand events. He sends you all his slimy, slithery love.

Due to the felicitations, there will be no weekly challenge. Consider yourselves off the hook (or on it, if you prefer).

Come back tomorrow to find out who won one of Tex's books! Could it be you? It might be.

Now, go eat until you explode and happy Fourth of July!



Don't forget to check out our July issue.

Sunday Poetry: The Fairy Gothmother - Jenn Preston Chushcoff

The Fairy Gothmother haunts children’s dark dreams.

She tends closet monsters that delight at their screams.

She’s queen of the creepies that hide under beds,

commander of crawlies that little ones dread.

She summons her ravens, beasts and black bats

to trouble bad children, like bullies and brats.

If you’re on The Good List there’s nothing to fear,

but if you’re on the Bad you’d better stay clear

of alleys, old mansions and dank moldy cellars,

since that’s where she keeps her shadowy dwellers.

She’s even made pacts with the kind fairy folk.

They get their flowers while she dons poison oak.

You’ll find her brooding with hands on her hips

in forgotten graveyards and sinking old ships.

Call her by name and she’ll help get you through.

You’ll see she’s not mean, just moody and blue.

But don’t ask for a carriage made from a gourd,

life-threatening shoes or a magical sword.

The Fairy Gothmother stirs grief for your foes.

They trip on their shoes and shoot milk through their nose.

She conjures strange sounds with odd bumps in the night,

seeds minds with bleak nightmares to give them a fright.

So if you’re in a jam and a tyrant’s the cause,

call on your FG and she’ll lay down her laws.

She’ll call upon Justice to even the score

since crooked wrongdoers is what she abhors.

There’s just one more thing I think I should say.

“Justice” is her pet and he brings Judgment Day!

Fairy Gothmother 

Written by Jenn Preston Chushcoff

Illustrated by M. Stagi

To see more of this calibre or macabre, check out our July Issue!


Would you like to see your limerick or poem up on Sunday Poetry? Email it to us at junipertreelit@gmail.com and put "Sunday Poetry" in the subject line.

Blast from the Past - Fox Edition Winners!

The entries were nothing short of horribly creative and terrifying terrific! Thank you to everyone who entered. Your creativity and constant rhythm of words never fails to amaze us.

The toe bribes help as well.

Oh, too true, Tex, too true.

Now – the winner of the Fox Edition is......

Jenn Preston Chushchoff with her piece Now He Has None. The piece will be featured in the August issue of Underneath The Juniper Tree.

I hate waiting, you know.

Don't we all Tex, don't we all! So below is her lovely written ditty with a sea shanty tune we can all sing along to in our minds while we toil away at the day. Let it begin, Jenn!

Charles and Victoria booed and hissed as Johnny sang a favorite sea chantey. The song was in poor taste considering the prior evening’s event. 

     Away, away, get the anchor aweigh!

    Our ship must set sail on the bonny sea.

    Goodbye, farewell. Give a heave, get it done.

    We’re homeward bound, we’re leaving.

    If you don’t pull, you’ll walk the plank

    or have your head nailed to one.

To be fair, Charles had a weak upper body. 

Now he has none.

And just a friendly reminder that your Edward Gorey - Chapter II submission deadline is on Tuesday!

The horror.

Quite. SO! Stop procrastinating and get it done and sent it in. You'll feel better about it in the morning.
junipertreelit@gmail.com 

July Issue

Yes! Another issue has arrived for your grabby little hands to twist and turn. Gobble up the words with your eyes, devour the images.

So much to nibble on, so little time. 

Thank you to all our contributors and our Murder of Editors for working so diligently on this masterpiece of musings.

We are currently working on a collection of bios and websites of our contributors so stay tuned to find out more about the insanity and genius that is the melting pot of Underneath The Juniper Tree.

Now, before Tex eats his own hands, I present to you the July Issue!

July Issue



Would you like to contribute to the unbearably beautiful work that graces the pages of Underneath The Juniper Tree? Check out our Contests, Challenges & Giveaways page. Or head over to our Submissions page to see what we accept. If you're feeling particularly bold–

That I always am.

Then send your work directly to junipertreelit@gmail.com and we'll tell you if it fits in our boat of monsters.

Last Chance for FREE BOOKS!.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear...

That's right. You have until tonight to subscribe to this amazing magazine and you, my darling toe-pie will be entered into our contest to win one of Tex's recommendations.

Oh please, oh pick me. Oh yes, oh yes me!

Tex, these are your books. You already own them.

I LOVE CONTESTS.

Collect all your friends and family, get them to subscribe to our feed and then tell us you did that! So easy. Tell us on here (anywhere on here!), Facebook, Twitter or even mail us a letter and we will enter you into the contest. Winner to be announced tomorrow July 1st with the July issue! You don't want to miss out. It's new, improved, decorated and anticipated.

See you there, if you dare...